The Secret Forces Of Attraction

This photo is copyright (c) 2013 and made available under wikimedia commons license

When taken at the very base level, attraction is very easily explained. That of course is when you see someone that has a look that you find to be appealing. It’s not necessarily everyone that likes the same characteristics in a person, with some favoring blonde hair and blue eyes, while other’s like dark hair combined with a larger build. There can be no denying that the most common attraction  between two people is very much visual. You have probably at one point or another found yourself in a place where you spy someone that you are instantly attracted to. You may notice that they are also looking at you, and that is when the games begin. You will both catch each other staring before quickly averting the eyes, until one of you finally gets the courage to strike up a conversation. It’s at that point that the forces of attraction can change dramatically.

This photo is copyright (c) 2013 and made available under royalty free license The initial spark of attraction can be very quickly snuffed out when you start talking to the person that caught your eye. Very often it turns out that you don’t particularly agree with what they say or find out that their personality doesn’t match the beauty of their appearance. It’s then that you realize that attraction is more than just physical and requires something a little more involved for a relationship to truly flourish. That’s not to say that people don’t just settle for the physical, but those types of relationships seldom blossom into something more as both sides seem quite content to be together in the short term till the attraction starts to go old or someone better looking comes along.

There are times when the forces of attraction take a little longer to kick in when compared to that lightning bolt that occurs when you spot someone across a crowded room. There are millions of stories of couples that knew each other for a long period of time, yet who never felt that immediate sizzle. Instead, theirs was something of a slow burn, with the attraction developing over time, usually because they found that their ethics, morals, and ways of thinking were so similar as to almost make them a perfect fit. While physical attraction can sometimes turn to revulsion over time due to clashes in personality, the opposite seems to happen in these cases. There is no physical attraction at the start, but it develops when the attraction becomes strong due to a melding of personalities. An average looking person that you would never ordinarily give a second glance to, can become very attractive over time when you realize how much you both share in the way that you think and act.

Physical attraction will always be the number one way in which people connect, but it can be argued that a deeper, psychological connection is what is required for love to blossom. We all want to be loved, but for many it’s much more important that we are understood. When someone is attracted to your mind and body, it makes for a rush of unbridled emotions that more often and not leads to love. Having someone so attracted to you that they feel your pain or joy without a single word being spoken is something that we should all try to feel at least once in our lives.

This photo is copyright (c) 2013 and made available under royalty free license

Most of us simply accept attraction as part of our lives, never really questioning what it is that draws us to another person. The only time that questions are ever raised in when that attraction starts to fade; it’s easy to become confused when an attraction that burned so bright for so long starts to flicker and die. No-one really knows for sure why it happens, but the general consensus is that we all change somewhat as we get older, which means the way in which we think and act can become altered. The person by our side who once understood us perfectly now doesn’t get us at all and the flame starts to flicker. Some people are lucky and find that one person early on who will stand by them for eternity, while others are forced to go through several relationships until that one perfect person comes along. And then there are those who never find their soul mate and who are still happy with their lot in life. It takes all kinds to make the world what it is, and while those people may change, the forces of attraction will always remain constant.

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Morgan is the founder and editor of REALITYPLEX. After suffering from a life-threatening accident, he realized that the way we perceive things around us is based on our beliefs, emotions and experiences. In an effort to draw the line between perception and reality, he launched REALITYPLEX in 2011. Get to know him better and connect with him on Facebook, Twitter and G+