Embarrass Yourself Like a Pro
The average person is terrified of the thought of being put in embarrassing situations or making a mistake that will somehow make them feel shame. What is ironic is that when those moments do arrive, as they will several times throughout your life, you usually end up making the problem even worse and embarrassing yourself more. It seems that in those moments where embarrassment causes the face to turn red, it also finds a way to turn the brain to mush so that we cannot extricate ourselves from the situation without making it worse.
This is a perfectly natural reaction that is probably nothing more than symptom of being flustered and making a mistake. It happens all the time, even in situations that aren’t considered to be embarrassing. It just seems to be the natural order of things that when you do something that brings attention, you end up compounding the problem when trying to fix it. It’s amazing how many times it actually happens, and it’s as though you are trying so hard to concentrate of righting the wrong, you fail to notice everything else going on around you. A perfect example of that in an embarrassing scenario is when you try to say something and it comes out all wrong. The harder you try to say it properly, the more your brain seems to fight against you by failing to provide the actual words you need.
The flipside of that coin are people that seem to feel no shame at all, but who have no problem embarrassing everyone around them. I’m not talking about parents who will embarrass their kids just by behaving normally, but rather people who willfully go out of their way to make like miserable for those that they know will have a tough time standing up for themselves. It’s an emotional bullying of sorts that can actually do some real damage. They prey on the fact that embarrassing someone might very well lead to that chain reaction of errors that we have discussed already.
There is yet one more type of person that falls into this category and that is the one who embarrasses themselves on a regular basis, yet never seems to realize that it is happening. While most of us watch their actions and become embarrassed for them, they simply keep on going with no regard for what is going on around them. They can really be placed in the same category as those that bully into shame, since their complete obliviousness to what is going on around them somehow makes them not guilty of the act of shaming.
The question then becomes how to stop the embarrassment from becoming more than it needs to be. If you are the one that is causing your own red-faced embarrassment, it’s best to stop and breathe for a moment before trying to fix things. That can be very tough especially since the natural instinct is to correct the wrong that you have done. If you say or do something wrong, just laugh it off when others point it out. Yes, you will still be embarrassed, but you will not give those around you more fuel for the fire.
The other two types of people really have to be told about the effect their actions are having on others. The problem that is likely to be faced when confronting a bully is that they will be unwilling to stop. They might even see you as the enemy at that point, doing all that they can to transfer some of that shame on to you. There is always the chance that you might get through to them and let them see the error of their ways. The last one might very well be the easiest of them all, as they might very well be embarrassed when it is pointed out that they are bringing shame to others. Just because they don’t see the embarrassing side of their behavior doesn’t mean that they won’t try to fix it when they see how it affects those around them.