Are The Rules Of Attraction The Same For Everyone?

Attraction is funny in that none of us really knows who is going to catch our eye at any given time. We all say that we have a type, but it would appear that attraction goes way beyond the color of someone’s hair or the shape of their body. More often than not, the way in which a person acts or behaves is equally as important as how they look, and is usually what ends up being the deciding factor on whether or not they are a match for you. Given that we are all rather complex characters, it’s easy to assume that there are a great number of equations that go into us being attracted to one person over another. Those waters become further muddied when we develop an attraction to a celebrity, especially since there is no way that we can really know what they are like. A perfect example of that can be found in a great quote by Lady Gaga:

This photo is copyright (c) 2013 and made available under wikimedia commons license

Then, when I’m in these relationships with people who are also creative, or creative in their own way, what happens is the attraction is initially there and it’s all unicorns and rainbows. And then they hate me.”

What people seem to forget, or simply try to ignore, is that the celebrity they fall for is not always what they appear to be on stage or on screen. That seems obvious when talking about actors, but singers and performers often develop a different identity when they take to the stage that is pretty far removed from their true self.  Lady Gaga is one of the most outlandish characters out there right now, but underneath that image is a woman who is talented and worked very hard to reach the point she is at today.

I can’t say for sure, but I imagine when she is writing or being creative in some other way, she doesn’t necessarily traipse around the house in the outfits that we have all come to either love or hate. A great deal of art, whether it’s music, writing, or otherwise, is drawn from personal experience, so you have to imagine that what she writes is done by Stefani Germanotta (her real name) and delivered through the vessel that is Lady Gaga. It’s here that people become confused by what’s real and what she allows us to see. I imagine that the above quote comes from the fact that people build a perception of her based on here Gaga character, only to be met by the hard-working, totally driven Stefani, who may not be as attractive to them as the fictional Gaga character is. When you think about it, though, the performer goes out of their way to make us attracted to them, as that will lead to greater success. If you don’t believe that’s true, take a look at this quote from actress Megan Fox:

This photo is copyright (c) 2013 and made available under wikimedia commons license

When you think about it, we actors are kind of prostitutes. We get paid to feign attraction and love. Other people are paying to watch us kissing someone, touching someone, doing things people in a normal monogamous relationship would never do with anyone who’s not their partner. It’s really kind of gross.”

What Miss Fox is essentially saying is that many forms of art can be reduced to the simple act of selling attraction. The performers want you to love them, which is usually enough to ensure that their career will continue on to the next TV show, movie, or album.  I’m sure that at some level we are all acutely aware of what is going on, but the attraction that we develop to the artist means that we are willing to pay so as to ensure that we will get to see them a little bit more. It may be why we are so willing to forget a bad performance or a horrible album, just so that we can get to see them again in the future. As I said at the start, attraction is funny, but it’s something that each and every one of us simply can’t get enough of.

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Morgan is the founder and editor of REALITYPLEX. After suffering from a life-threatening accident, he realized that the way we perceive things around us is based on our beliefs, emotions and experiences. In an effort to draw the line between perception and reality, he launched REALITYPLEX in 2011. Get to know him better and connect with him on Facebook, Twitter and G+